It’s starting to feel like the dog days of summer + Covid. But before we know it, December will be here and we will be ready to ring in a new year. Whenever I am asked how I have been feeling my answer is always the same, “It depends on the day and what I am doing”. Some days I feel restless and some days I am occupied and don’t think too much about anxiety levels.
But there are those days, like today. What is today’s purpose? What should I get done or what should I do to help me enjoy the day? Trying to answer that question can leave my chest feeling tight and the day has not even started. Today I decided to just figure it out as I go. I went from checking news/social media, to reading a book, to try some exercising, to putting groceries away.
I think the most empowering part of my day was when I decided to get a little messy. Instead of letting my anxiety continue to build up, I went outside with a plain canvas and some paint. I turned up my music really loud, took a breath, closed my eyes, and began to rub my paint filled hands across the canvas. I did not care how it turned out or how much paint I got everywhere. It felt exhilarating to make art based on my emotions in that moment. I am no artist, but I knew it would turn out exactly as it was supposed to. And it did.
So then the question becomes, does everyday and every minute need a purpose? Sure, there is always a big picture of what your purpose may be. And maybe there is a purpose to everyday and I just have not figured it out yet! What do you do when you don’t know what to do? And how are you feeling at this point during the pandemic? Let’s talk about it!
Keep it moving!
-CJS